It’s Like Looking At A Mirror…

If there’s one thing I hate (apart from lawsuits), it’s people that become famous by stealing the fame of more talented people. So you can imagine how fun I found Friday’s show to be.

First off we had Jerry Hall on the show. She slept with Mick Jagger.
I was talking David Soul too. He didn’t sleep with Mick Jagger.
I hope not anyway. That’s an ugly image.

So, I wanted to ask David Soul about being in Starsky and Hutch, and what it was like to drive the cool cars and beating up pimps and that. But then Jerry butts in, talking about how she knows Mick Jagger. It was annoying to say the least. It’s not like I discuss my sex life with my guests.
Any more.

The last time I did, it made my guest – Russell Brand – a bit uncomfortable. And he’s seen a lot of lady’s bits. I think it was the mention of nipple-clamps and cigarette lighters that pushed things too far.

Then, it was time for Risteard Cooper’s interview.
For those that are unaware, he makes a living by impersonating yours truly. Well, I say impersonating, but really he doesn’t sound a thing like me. He sounds really wooden and makes pauses at inopportune points. But the audience love to watch me sitting there while he’s doing me.

Doing me as in “imitating me”. When I said, “Do me, Risteard, Do me” during the show, I meant he should impersonate me. And nothing else, OK?

The worst though was when he compared me to Bull McCabe. That’s the violent land-grabbing character from the play “The Field”. It was at that point when I really wanted to reach across the desk and smack him in the face. But I’m above that now.

Court appointed anger management, dontcha know. To stop me raising my fists to people over trivial arguments…


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