“Marriage isn’t a word. It’s a sentence.”

Sorry i haven’t posted in a while. I was helping Gerry Ryan pack up his stuff for moving out into his swanky new bachelor pad. He recently split with his wife Morah after 26 years of marriage. I know what you’re thinking, and yes that is her real name, and yes Gerry actually did it with a woman.

You should see the new place now. It’s super cool. He has a water slide, and a Playstation, and a toaster, and everything. It’s so cool, I’d almost leave me own wife. Except she has my money buried somewhere. Oh and because I love her. (If you’re reading this, Hi sweetie!)

It’s sad that Gerry’s splitting with his wife. He tells me his missus wanted him out since he was only half a man now since the incident.

For those that don’t know, Gerry got a vasectomy a few years ago. I say vasectomy – close enough to one. Let it be a lesson to all: don’t steal the last donut from under Charlie Bird’s nose. He’ll rip you to pieces for his fix of jam.

Anyway Gerry told me how, after a night on the beer, he drunkenly hopped into the bed the other night and told Morah he couldn’t get it up unless he thought of someone he really fancied, like himself.

Not the smartest of moves. Ah well, life goes on. I think it was the great Irish rock n’roll band, B*Witched , who once said: “C’est La Vie”.

They also said “Don’t Blame it on the Weatherman”. That’s why he shouldn’t get angry when he finds out she’s shacked up with Martin King.


1 Response to ““Marriage isn’t a word. It’s a sentence.””

  1. 1 Melitarx March 25, 2008 at 1:34 pm

    omg.. good work, guy

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